Random Thoughts while Driving in Waco

By Jack Smith

Jack can be reached at jwsmith2@flash.net

I’m sure that at one time or another I’ve been called a couch potato, although a recliner potato would be more accurate.

Why a couch potato? Why not a couch tomato or a couch squash? Well, the term was coined back when television was called the boob tube. One who watches a boob tube is a boob tuber and a tuber is a potato. But today many people spend more time in front of the computer than on the couch. They could be called a mouse potato. With iPads and laptops, you can be a combo couch/mouse potato. Ain’t multitasking grand?

The term pint-sized is used to describe something or someone who is very small or tiny. Should we call something or someone who is very large gallon-sized?

To be grammatically correct (which is more important than being politically correct), shouldn’t we say, “I’ll have two eggs over easily”?

What is the oldest soft drink? Dr Pepper began in Waco in 1885. Coke in Atlanta in 1886, and Pepsi in New Bern, North Carolina, in 1898. The second Waco soft drink, Big Red, was invented in 1937. Waco wins for first and most soft drinks. Go team!

Until our rain in the middle of August, we were in a severe drought and still are way behind in annual rainfall. I was reminded of the phrase, “If the good Lord’s willing and the creek don’t rise.” I was thinking that we might change that to “If the good Lord’s willing and the creek don’t sink.”

If you saw a heat wave, would you wave back?

I recently saw the popular phrase, “pull the wool over your eyes.” Where did that come from? Several centuries ago, it was standard practice in Europe and America for both men and women to wear wigs, whether they were bald or not. Judges in England still do. The wigs were usually made of wool. When thieves wanted to steal something that a wig wearer was carrying, they sneaked up to the individual and literally pulled the wig (wool) over the victim’s eyes. Temporarily blinded and confused, the victim didn’t know what was happening around him. The thief used this opportunity to run away with what the victim was carrying. I’m a kinda judge (JP), and I am balding. I could use a wig, and since I’m frequently confused about what’s going on around me, no one would have to pull it over my eyes.

I saw a promotion for a TV show that referred to the show as a cloak-and-dagger type. We all know that cloak and dagger basically means a mystery or intrigue or secrecy, but where did it come from? According to Wikipedia, “These phrases referred to a genre of swashbuckler drama in which the main characters literally wore these items.” The cloak would hide the person’s identity, and the dagger was a concealable and silent weapon. Today, we are more of a hoodie-and-handgun genre.

Vicki said, “You weren’t listening to a thing I said, were you?” I thought to myself, that’s a strange way to start a conversation.

More puns: A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.

Once you’ve seen one shopping center, you’ve seen a mall.

IF I WERE KING: People who send unsolicited emails and phone calls about get-rich-quick schemes, free credit cards, free trips, free stock tips, cheap insurance and cheap mortgage rates would suffer a constant “error” message on their computers and on their foreheads.

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